Toy Review – A Collection Of Metal Butt Toys

To follow up this week’s Intro To Butts I thought my toy review would… have to do with butts.

This one will be about a couple different items because there’s only so much one buttplug does.

If you don’t know how to prepare for anal play I seriously suggest my earlier post. None of this will be useful or enjoyable for you if you don’t prep first.

My first butt plug came from a local sex shop that I used to live right next to in Sacramento, when I was 18 and sort of intimidated by everything so we just sort of picked something.

It was this one.

Boy was that a bad idea.

Not that theres anything wrong with this plug – there’s not. Tantus is a great company (if you can’t tell from my previous posts), the toy was high quality, silicone, body-safe, sanitizable, etc etc.

The problem was that this toy was over 4″ around (larger than a US 1 dollar coin, larger than a toonie for you Canadians.) and ribbed, and solid hard silicone. I’d had fingers and penises in my ass prior to this but it’s really just not the same. This toy felt huge, the ribs weren’t all that fun upon insertion and removal, and the bulb-stem-base ratio wasn’t enough for me to feel comfortable. I don’t think this is the best beginner plug.

This is a mini-review of this toy I guess, even now I wouldn’t purchase it again (I no longer have it) I have no use for the ribs. I had a partner actually try to fuck me with this toy and there was exactly zero pleasure for me in having my asshole grazed by ribs as this thing was vigorously thrust into and yanked out of my body. Ribs might be your butt’s thing, they’re not my butt’s thing.

When I talk about the bulb-stem-base size difference, I mean my asshole felt stretched and I didn’t feel like I had a good enough grip on the toy, especially during PIV sex or when engaged in activities that would cause me to tense up. The plug got pushed out during sex and I shot it across the floor once after tensing up too much from another activity. God help me if I’d sneezed, I would have weaponized the thing.

And the bullet? Your butt might like vibrations, mine doesn’t really care for them, so that wasn’t useful to me.

And so I got rid of it.

MOVING ON a few years and into butt plugs I do like.

The top left is a fairly generic plug commonly referred to as “princess plugs”, the two in the middle are by njoy, and the one on the far right is a fairly generic ass hook.

Metal plugs seemed intimidating at first because, well, they’re big ol hunks of steel, but I’d recommend these a million times over some other materials. They’re super easy to clean, they’re nice and smooth for easy insertion and removal, they can be warmed or cooled (and will adjust to your body temp) and I actually like the weightiness to them, it’s a reminder that they’re in there without being uncomfortable.

The one on the right (sorry, switched the order on you) is usually called a “princess plug” because its got a jewel on the end of it making your butthole all cute and sparkly. I’m starting to see a few companies make these in silicone, and you can get them in glass as well. They generally all share the same relative shape and style.

I personally find a few pros and cons to this plug.

I like the weight (mine is .4lbs), and as someone who wears thongs/gstrings I like the wide base, my underwear doesn’t usually slip under it and get tangled. And I like the Bulb-stem-base ratio. Once inserted my anus can return to almost-closed as opposed to the stretched position the Tantus plug above left me in. the slimmer stems are just more comfortable for me in terms of long-term wear and it feels more secure, like I’m not going to cough and shoot the thing out like a missile.

A thing I don’t like about this plug is the circular base. But you just said you like the base? I know, I know. The downside is it pinches my buttcheeks. It’s cute when you’re bent over the edge of the bed with your ass spread apart but I can’t wear this while doing any normal things like standing, walking, sitting…anything that doesn’t involve my cheeks spread open. This plug is more like a piece of jewelry than a practical sex toy for me. Other people have absolutely no problem wearing them though, so YMMV. I’ve got a meaty ass. I also almost had a “we might need to go to the ER” moment with this plug. I was in an ass-up position for a very extended period of time (over an hour), my muscles were starting to really relax as I was just sitting there waiting, not doing anything else, and I felt the base sort of wedging in sideways. It was pretty uncomfortable, I felt it pinching, so I caught it long before it disappeared, but it was an unsettling experience. I don’t think it’s something that would have ever happened if I had been up and about doing things or having sex, times where I’m no where near as relaxed and stationary, but this is something to be cautious of, especially if you turn into an advanced anal-player. Luckily, they make them with much bigger chunkier bases than the one I own if this worries you.

I also like the straight stem when it comes to PIV or use of other vaginal toys, it doesn’t feel like it gets pushed around so much. The base also stays out of the way of the other insertable better than the nJoy bases.

Canadian and American quarters are the same size. IT LOOKS BIG but once you’ve got it in and your butt is clenching around the itty bitty stem instead of the bulb, you really just feel a fullness, not like you’re being pried open. I don’t engage in anal play with any sort of regularity really and I can get all of these toys in comfortably with just a generous application of spit. (I don’t necessarily recommend this for you, I’m just trying to demonstrate how easy these things are for me) Things in the computer screen are not as big as they appear. Or something like that…

The two njoy plugs are the small and medium sizes, their respective weights being .3 and .4 pounds.

I like the curve of the stems when going solo, but I find they get pushed around a lot more with PIV than the straight stem and the plug will want to turn to the side to accommodate something in my vag.

The long skinny base is a lot more comfortable for extended wear, it doesn’t pinch my skin because it sits between my buttcheeks instead of pushing them apart, but my underwear sometimes gets tangled in it, so I try to wear full-backed panties with these. Depending on how much the pants I’m wearing allow for buttcheek spreading (i.e.: if I’m wearing stretchy or loose pants, or no pants at all) I can sometimes feel the base when I sit, like it is making contact with what I’m sitting on and being pushed into my ass. Sometimes fun, sometimes not. I also think that the longer base might get in the way a bit during PIV sex. (I haven’t actually asked my husband outright “does that scrape your dick?” but if I’m using a dildo on myself, the toy and the plug are definitely competing for real estate between my legs, so…the answer is he can at least feel it, it may or may not actually bother him. It bothers my dildos.)

The shape of the base does have one major advantage over circular bases like the princess plugs though. As I started to talk about earlier, your butt can swallow. If you’ve been wearing a plug all day and have gotten used to the feeling and are supremely relaxed, or if you’re having some super hot rough sex where the plug is being bumped around a lot, it is possible that your anus could relax/expand and your butt muscles could pull the plug inside you. It has happened to people. It has almost happened to me. A smooth relatively small circle is a lot easier to suck into your butt than a long skinny weird shaped thing. Princess plugs and similar circle-base plugs come in all sorts of sizes mind you, you can get the same size princess plug with a larger base, but if the idea of your butt swallowing up your sex toys is terrifying to you, plugs with weird shaped bases are going to be your friend. If you’re a seasoned anal player you may want to find larger-based toys.

The small

And the medium

I know it looks scary, but again, check out the stems

Not so scary. Those things are smaller than your pinky, and they’re what you’re going to feel with your anus the most once you get the thing in.

Now, some people like having their buttoholes stretched, that’s cool too, there’s lots of plugs made for those purposes. I’m not into it though. It’s also something that really needs to be worked up to, not something that butt newbies should be fiddling around with just yet. Put the road cone down…

And last but not least, ass hooks!

Some look like mine, where they’re just skinny U shaped rods. The one pictured has a diameter less than a dime. Others look more like plugs, with bulbs on the ends, sometimes several, in different sizes, like a snowman. Ass hooks work by inserting the end into the butt with the handle resting on your tailbone, and attaching some sort of restraint (rope, straps, etc) to the handle through the loop on the end. That restraint then attaches to something else, usually some part of the body (but solid anchor points like a headboard are used too). For people with long hair, a piece of rope can be wound into their ponytail. Others attach it to a mouth gag, collar, or anchor it over the shoulders. The purpose of this is to put the wearer in a predicament. Usually the restraint is just the tiniest bit too short to be comfortable, so the wearer has to hold a certain position. If they move, it pulls the hook deeper into their ass. Hair ties and gags will keep the wearers head either craned back or upright, shoulder anchors will keep them sitting up straight. Slouching or drooping the head will pull on the hook, staying in the intended position relax the hook. People play with these to varying degrees of intensity from pleasurable to mildly annoying to extremely stressful.

So, thats the extent of what I put in my butt these days. Happy plugging’!