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Help! I’m Kinky? – A mini-series of intros into The Lifestyle – Volume 2 : Learning The Ropes – Safewords

We’ve made it – our final chapter for Learning The Ropes – figuring out our safewords! Previously we laid out a roadmap for negotiating a great scene. Safewords are a part of scene negotiation, but they felt to me like they deserved their own post because there’s a lot more to cover than “say uncle!”

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Help! I’m Kinky? – A mini-series of intros into The Lifestyle – Volume 2 : Learning The Ropes – Elements Of The Scene

Welcome back for another instalment of how on earth to find your way through discovering your kinks! To recap, we’ve talked about the basics of entering the kinky lifestyle, where you might fall on the great big spectrum of not-vanilla, and how to play safer. Last time we went over how to find and set

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Help! I’m Kinky? A mini-series of intros into The Lifestyle – Volume 2 : Learning The Ropes – Setting Limits

Hi there! Sorry it’s been a while since our last chat, I was taking a little break. Previously we covered some safety aspects that are attached to acting out your kinks, and dug a little bit into what goes into giving and obtaining proper consent to performing these kinks with others. This time I want

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Help! I’m Kinky? A mini-series of intros into The Lifestyle – Volume 2 : Learning The Ropes – Safety and Consent

Alright, so we’ve discovered that we might not be very vanilla afterall, and we’ve touched on (but certainly not exhausted) the vast array of roles and labels we might find ourselves acting and wearing, and we’re working to handle our newbie frenzy so we don’t come off as rambunctious puppies with no sense about us….

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Help! I’m Kinky? A mini-series of intros into The Lifestyle – Volume 1 : Now What? – Fetish Frenzy and FOMO

Frenzy and FOMO – two terms we use a lot in “The Scene”, especially around newbies. What do they mean? Why do we feel them? What do we do about it? That’s what this post is all about. Frenzy can be pretty self-explanatory even if we all feel it different or for different reasons –

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Help! I’m Kinky? A mini-series of intros into The Lifestyle – Volume 1 : Now What? – A Foreword

First of all, welcome home! A little bit of a foreword :  I’ve identified as kinky since basically forever now. I’m certainly not the one-true-voice-of-kink but I do hope to offer a little useful insight based on my many many years here. I signed up on Fetlife probably the day I was legally allowed to

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