Toy Review – The Real Nude Helio by Blush Novelties
I keep saying that I’ve found “my new favorite dildo”, that I’ve found “the next perfect dildo”…and then I move on to the next one. I think it’s safe to assume this will continue to happen and I have to concede that I just like a whole lot of dildos now. My new current fave is the Helio from Blush Novelties’ Real Nude line.
The Helio has all my preferred dildo traits you’re probably tired of hearing about by now : soft, smooth, silicone, kinda boring. It’s a bit smaller than the last Real Nude dildo I reviewed but shares all the same dual-density squish and suction cup base qualities I enjoyed previously. The slightly smaller size makes the Helio a more likely candidate than the Ergo when I’m picking out something to fuck myself with as it requires a bit less warm-up, and the less girthy shaft has a little more flexibility to it as well which I like for when I’m wielding it with my hands instead of suctioning it down onto a surface.
I think the most important discovery the Helio and some of the other dildos I’ve recently dubbed “my new favorite” have led me to, is that what my hands think feels realistic and what my vagina thinks feels realistic are two totally different things. My first favourite was the Vixen Mustang and I thought for sure it would always and forever hold that title. I’ve felt guilt over each and every other dildo I’ve given the “favorite” title to since then, but the honest truth is that I haven’t used my Mustang in some many many months. What I’ve learned through the handful of other dual-density and soft silicone dildos I’ve reviewed since the Mustang is that my vagina is far less detail-oriented than my eyes or hands are. By all accounts the Mustang is the most anatomically correct dual-density or soft silicone dildo I own, which would make you think it would feel the most like a bio-cock, but my vag disagrees. The Mustang is the most texturally correct (both in structural detail and skin-like feel of the silicone) and pretty close to most density correct of the dildos I own, but again my vag does not agree with my hand’s assessment.
I find myself looking at “realistic” dildos and making assumptions that they must feel amazing the more actually realistic they visually appear, but I need to check those assumptions against the actual reviews I’ve given my more “unrealistic” or boring looking dildos and realize that what I truly enjoy is things that don’t look anything like real dicks, and that I need to be okay with “boring” because boring is what feels amazing. I think that for the most part, bio-penises are still a lot more squishy and yielding than the top silicone layers of dual-density dildos have managed to replicate, so even if a bio-penis has a lot of detail to it, my vag doesn’t necessarily pick up on it, and this is why the highly-realstic and detailed dildos hurt me (even if they’re visual perfect matches to someone’s real penis) whereas the plain smooth shafts that glide in and out of me effortlessly and without scraping up my insides are what remind me most of a real dick.
So here’s to learning to love that I love boring. It is still a bit of a challenge because there’s only so many ways you can make a plain-jane-dildo but also make it different than everyone else’s plain dildo, but I think Blush is doing an okay job with the Real Nude line (there’s also more models in this line like the Sumo and Suko that are not as plain and I probably wouldn’t be able to handle, so the Real Nude dildos aren’t all boring.) I think the thing that stands out the most for me with the Helio is the long taper of the head. I like my dildos to have a little bit of shape to them but super prominent bulbs on the ends can sometimes be the deal-breaker for me because they just wind up catching on my pubic bone and I can’t thrust with them as much as I’d like. The Helio’s firm inner core stops just short of the glans, so it’s perfectly soft and squishy for making its way past my pubic bone (and also doesn’t jab my cervix if I get too carried away)
While it’s a little bit longer, girth-wise the Helio isn’t that much different than the Mustang and I honestly considered hauling the Mustang back out and giving it another shot when I realized this, but then I remembered the way that the Vixskin silicone seems to just eat up lubricant. The Mustang is still the prettiest dildo I own, but in all other categories there are others like the Helio coming out on top.